January 18, 2009

A Sentence of Sorts

I’m a huge fan of commercials. Not those overwrought, behemoths that they produce for the Super Bowl, but the everyday commercials that either make me want to put my foot through the TV, or make me want to know more about the actor who just gave me 30 seconds of joy. I’ve told you before; I watch a lot of TV. Therefore, I’m pretty good at both spotting commercial trends and picking up things that your average consumer may not care enough about to pick up.

This weekend I was watching football and a Comcast commercial came on that touted whatever shoddy package they are currently hocking. The spot was predictably boring, but the real fun started at the end when the music they chose rose high enough above the fatuous voice over for me to identify it. The section of the song they used had no lyrics, but it was unmistakably Of Montreal’s A Sentence of Sorts in Kongsvinger. Either Comcast assumed no one would know this relatively obscure song, or they didn’t dig to deep into the Of Montreal catalog before selecting it.

Here are some samples before I get to the specific track they chose. My favorite four album titles from their nine LP discography are: The Gay Parade, Coquelicot Asleep in the Poppies: A Variety of Whimsical Verse, Satanic Panic in the Attic, and my favorite album, Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer. The last of which happens to be the greatest breakup album of all time. If I had to choose their best lyric, I'd go with: I guess it would be nice to give my heart to a God/But which one, which one do I choose?/All the churches filled with losers, psycho or confused/I just want to hold the divine in mind/And forget. Searchingly plaintive and disparaging at the same time, no?

So, I’m not to sure that Of Montreal is exactly the sort of band that a corporation would have play at their annual Holiday Party. Maybe I’m wrong and their CEO is really into the indie music scene. If that’s the case, I will write another 2500 word letter defending these thieves.

A Sentence of Sorts is certainly not Of Montreal’s most risqué song. However, in the spirit of full disclosure, I will include all of the lyrics for you here.

I spent the winter on the verge of a total breakdown
While living in Norway
I felt the darkness of the black metal bands
But being such fawn of a man
I didn't burn down any old churches
Just slept way too much, just slept

My mind rejects the frequency
It's static craziness to me
Is it a solar fever?

The TV man is too loud
Our plane is sleeping on a cloud
You turn the dial, I'll try and smile
We've eaten plastic weather
This family sticks together
We will escape from the south to the west side

My mind rejects the frequency
It's just verbosity to me

I spent the winter with my nose buried in a book
While trying to restructure my character
Because it had become vile to its creator
And through many dreadful nights
I lay praying to a saint that nobody has heard of
And waiting for some high times to come again

My mind rejects the frequency
It's static craziness to me
Is it a solar fever?

The TV man is too loud
Our plane is sleeping on a cloud
You turn the dial, I'll try and smile
We've eaten plastic weather
This family sticks together
We will escape from the south to the west side

My mind rejects the frequency
It's just verbosity to me

Dirty old shadow, stay away
Don't play your games with me
I am older now, I see the way you operate
If you don't hurt me then you die

My mind rejects the frequency
It's static craziness to me
Is it a solar fever?

The TV man is too loud
Our plane is sleeping on a cloud
You turn the dial, I'll try and smile
We've eaten plastic weather
This family sticks together
We will escape from the south to the west side

My mind rejects the frequency
It's just verbosity to me


Okay, that probably wasn’t necessary. As you can see though, Comcast would not have picked this particular song if they had to use it in its entirety. Interestingly, when we last used Comcast, I was on the verge of a total breakdown while living in Louisiana.


Originally, I also planned to write about my favorite trend in commercials—what I call the Bob Stephenson trend—but this post became more about a band I love than the television. We will have to revisit commercial repetitiveness and the man who spoke Fight Club's best line. ”Of course it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article a dildo, never your dildo.”

1 Comments:

Blogger Dani said...

witty prose (check)
obscure music (check)
pictures of babies (???)

This post was almost complete

January 20, 2009 at 1:54 AM  

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